Troy Bolton and Gabriella Montez have been the foundation of my *cough* as the kids say, “relationship goals” since I was 10 years old.
Seriously, there have been few phases in my life as influential as my High School Musical obsession. My first concert was HSM. I know the choreography. I had a dog tag with Zac Efron’s face on it that I wore every day.
Anyway, ever since I saw that movie at the tender age of 10, I have dreamed of having a magical evening just like the beginning of High School Musical. I have longed for a romantic night where a man looks at me with a twinkle in his eye, and we sing an uncomfortable Karaoke duet. Then, we fall in love and wait for two movies to kiss. How pure! How true! I have yet to have any New Years that is even remotely enjoyable.
I think that my best memory of the night is the first time I spent it with a friend. I was in Grade 4. We drank Ginger Ale out of champagne glasses and took shots of milk. Her mom let us watch Mean Girls after we took an oath to never repeat the language used in the movie.
I have come to a conclusion. New Years Eve is a stupid holiday.
Hear me out – we like to pretend it is glamorous, but nothing ever works out the way that we plan. The nature of the holiday itself is very cookie-cutter. You go out in a sparkly dress. You kiss someone at midnight. The next day you swear that you will be healthy.
In reality, you probably got a little too tipsy, saw the guy you wanted to kiss at midnight with someone else, and ruined your New Year’s resolution when you needed McDonald’s to cure your hangover.
Maybe I’m just bitter because I have never had a New Year’s kiss (Last year I was in a Denny’s kissing a waffle at midnight). That being said, everything always goes to shit on New Years Eve. Lineups are long, traffic is insane and even dive bars charge gross cover fees. New Years Eve is like a yearly prom where everyone spends way too much money on a night that they don’t even remember.
I still think it is fun to smother everything in glitter, but I believe that the night should be treated the same as Halloween where we expect it to be a hot mess. Everyone loves Halloween. They walk into it knowing it will be one of their least classy nights of the year. They celebrate it for that reason. If we treated New Years Eve the same way, we would start 2017 off feeling a lot less disappointed.
It isn’t a magical, romantic night. Of course, a kiss is always a plus, but the New Year should be a celebration of the fact that this weird world is still spinning – not yet another romanticized holiday. Hello 2017. Please don’t suck.